On numerous occasions, I’ve complained about not knowing who reads my blog. Yes, I’m a bit paranoid… and this is why, up until a few months ago, I didn’t mention any names here. I got tired of playing that game, but one fact remains the same… I really wonder who actually reads my blog. I don’t obsess about it every minute of every day, but it does pop into my head every so often. Obviously, it’s on my mind now.

A comment on a recent blog, along with a bunch of others on another site, brought back this sense of… well… I’m not really sure. Basically, like I’ve mentioned already, I wonder who reads this crap.

I’d like to think I know most of the people who read my blog… I don’t think it really offers anything of interest to a stranger. The fact is, however, I’m deluding myself. I have no control over who gets a peek (albeit a very small peek) at my life, simply because I’ve posted this online. I don’t even have the satisfaction of knowing exactly who these voyeurs, if i may call them that, are. I’m… umm… I don’t know. The words that come to mind are familiar to my friends already… I’m a control-freak. I know that not knowing things is a form of losing control, and I’m freaking out. Damn… this is not fun.

Ok, I’m tempted to ask everybody who reads this to comment… but I’m not particularly fond of that idea either. I’m really not sure, despite all my claims, if I want to know who my audience is. It may be that I’m just flattering myself. What if I do know everybody who reads this blog? Do I really want that kind of blow to my ego? Another word comes to mind… indecisive. An indecisive control-freak… not a pretty sight.

Oh, I just realized… just now, I’ve exposed myself to more scrutiny than I have in previous entries.